Upsetting the middle men

Picture the scene - 35000 middle of the road, middle aged men from middlesex that listen to Virgin Radio to make them feel young, gathered at the Isle of Wight festival in 2006. In the last few years they've hummed their way through Bryan Adams, the Counting Crows and Travis. Snow Patrol and Starsailor were a big too loud last year, but they liked the singles. It's Friday night and they're ready to rock.

And then out step the Prodigy. Keith Flint screams obscenities for the first fifteen minutes. Everyone leaves.

The Prodigy? Now don't get me wrong, I like the Prodigy, but the last time I saw them they were absolutely filthy, both in their language and the noise they made. When I saw them they were supporting Guns 'n Roses, making for a fantastically surreal night.

Last year, Morrissey was announced at the festival. The result was a barrage of abuse on one of the festivals' forums, with most people seeing him as far too radical. When Virgin Radio announced he was to be replaced by Travis there was a sigh of relief from Volvo drivers around the country.

So if Morrissey is a bit controversial, what does that make the Prodigy?

The point is that my Mum is considering going to the Isle of Wight festival. Now, I should make it clear out that my Mum isn't a former hippy, she doesn't have tie-dye dresses and a nose piercing. My Mum's a Cliff Richard fan, and not even a very big fan anymore. She didn't even know who Sylvester Stallone was when I asked her (not that that's relevant to the festival, but it does give some idea of her only distant interest in popular culture). But my Mum told me she might "like the atmosphere" at the festival, or something like that, because everyone at work was talking about it.

I doubt she'll actually make it to the festival, but I'm tempted to try and talk her round, just so she will turn up and gasp as Smack My Bitch Up starts up.